It’s taken me, with amazing amounts of help, guidance and love from my life coach, guide, dearest friend Pierre Luc Beaudry months to create this website. He’s observed me manifest things and experiences very quickly. And yet subconsciously, I was holding this project back. One day, after many hours spent trying to convince me that I am worthy of the gifts, blessings and abilities in my life… He blurted out, “what’s going on? What’s holding you back?” (From manifesting this site and transitioning into doing healing work and writing more full time.) It’s always been about not feeling worthy enough. Somewhere within my life, I created within me, feelings of unworthiness. And it’s been a struggle to find the courage to accept myself, as is – perfectly imperfect.
I do believe that this is one of my greatest gifts – to show people that we are all perfectly imperfect. And within our imperfection is…perfection. I write these words a lot…”we were created by love and so we are love”. And if we are love, why can’t we forgive ourselves for being human? Well in writing this post, I finally “toss in the towel”! This is it! I’m launching this site today!! YAY!! lol I’m nervous, thrilled, and humbled!! It’s been a huge labor of love, huge life lessons and an in depth look at what I do, as a healer. Part of the hesitation was that I do miraculous things, through intensive, healing energy and love. And I feel confidant in those abilities (finally). And I feel OVERJOYED that I am blessed with them. Yet, I had no idea how to explain what I do. To me, it’s just love…unconditional love.
Within the photo I chose for today, is a puddle with some oil left from a car in it. The little two year old that I nanny and I stood over it, for a good 15 minutes. I kept taking his hand and slowly walking around the puddle. With each tiny step, we saw more beauty. The oil was iridescent and you could see beautiful clouds reflecting in it. Parents from his preschool kept walking by, saying things like, “isn’t that gross what our cars do? And PLEASE don’t let him close to that mess!” My response, “you’re missing out. Don’t you see the beauty within it?” Again, another reminder of why I haven’t felt worthy of this life. I’ve often been thought of as odd. Because I am intensely mindful of all of the gifts that are abundantly surrounding all of us. And I slow down to observe and sit in awe and gratitude. I hope that through reading my posts, that you too join in on the wonderfulness of mindfulness.
“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” Wayne Dyer Oh how I adore this quote and Wayne Dyer! And that’s exactly what I have done! I’ve changed the way I looked at this site, my work, my gifts and my own self. I shifted my consciousness and I realized that this is who I am. And if I can’t be joyful in my own “Me-ness”, how am I going to live a joyful, abundant life? During the past four years, I’ve become more joyful, healthy, abundant and coming to a peaceful spot within. And just within the past week since I finally decided that it was time, that I felt worthy of this site, I have manifest amazing things!! I raised my vibration to my natural state of joy and magic happened!
1) Months ago, I was interviewed and told that an article was going to be posted on Bunyhawk.com about me being a Shaman. And I was also, asked to write another article about Shamanism by the same magazine. I also, wrote an article for Mannabliss.com about “tapping into Source Energy”. All three articles were supposed to come out in March. It’s now May. I released it and thought, “it will come about, when everything is in alignment. And this past week, I was told that the articles will be coming out next week! Perfectly in alignment with the launching of my site!!
2) I kept thinking, “I really want a facial.” lol I am not very materialistic and I don’t attach much thought to my exterior self. (Don’t get me wrong, I’m thrilled that I lost 90 pounds and I look 10 years younger now that I am healthy! But I boycotted make-up about 20 years ago.) And yet lately, I’ve been thinking – “girl, it’s time you bought some good moisturizer and started taking care of your face!” So…2 days ago, I was in a mall with the lil one and this lady stopped me to give me a free sample of one of their products. I said, “no thank you, unless it’s organic.” She said, “no worries, it’s all organic. Come try it. Give me your hand.” OMG this stuff is AMAZING!! So I told her that I would love to buy her least expensive, smallest bottle. Well, when I walked away from her, she had given me over $500 worth of the product and a voucher for a free facial!! lol I only paid a very small amount of money. When she was moisturizing my hands, we talked about me, being a healer, intuitive and life coach. And she asked for a reading. So I went right into Astral Consciousness and everything that I told her, was spot on! And one of the things I told her, was that she wasn’t meant to be working in a small kiosk in the middle of a mall. That she was suppose to have a very high position of power within the company. She ended up being the general director of the company!! I love it when I read people so clearly! lol
3) That connection with the “product lady” is going to lead into a few business opportunities… I’ll leave it at that for now.
Many other things have happened since I finally decided that it was time to launch my site! I shifted my consciousness and now feel worthy of wonderfulness. Not feeling worthy is a huge wall that keeps us from creating vibrant health, creating loving relationships and holistic abundance. Once I shifted and began to feel worthy – amazing things began to happen! This lesson keeps recycling for me personally. And I do believe it is because every time it happens, I become more equipped to teach others how to feel worthy, how to manifest and how to become more joy-filled.
Namaste beautiful beings… And thank you for visiting! REMEMBER: YOU ARE worthy!!